Monday, September 20, 2010

sien lo

first day of back to school and I am back to being not-so-enthused-about-life.
probably it was the awesome work/fun/productive holiday in comparison,
maybe it was the delayed train and bus to campus this morning,
pretty sure its was the sucky and pricey college food,
and could be because of the subject and lecturer that doesn't make sense,
but the first day of back to school was very indescribable, in a not so nice way.

This semester started in August. it is now the end of september and I don't think I have yet to learn anything productive. The subjects so far are a big question mark. Mr Chandra is definately the only lecturer that I look forward to spending a one-hour train/bus ride to see for two hours. In other words, uni is very uninspiring, very very uninspiring. The only thing that is keeping me going is work and dance.

and my mom wonders why I couldnt be bothered about the new college term.
she should come attend a class or two.

Sunday, September 5, 2010

and then the bottle breaks

I can't talk to you
because you're judgemental;
because we're not close;
because you only talk about yourself;
because you don't care;
because you don't understand;
because you have too much on your mind;
because you're too busy;
because I can't trust you;
because you don't listen;
because you're shallow;
because you're too far;
I can't talk to you because I don't know how.

they call it the school of life

i learnt two important lessons today. two very unpleasant, but very important lessons.

1. Respect comes from both side.
Dealing with a tight-ass client who's a unprofessional prick but think that he's the best and I'm a nicompoop, has taught me the concept of 'do unto others as you would have them do unto you'. When working with the difficult a--, there were ridiculous terms and conditions that well, to put it blatantly, exploits me. I'd be the schmuck that lose precious time and money everthing were to be done his way. Nobody wants to be the schumck! What do you do in a case like this? So, to have the balance tilt back in your favour, fight fire with fire! He disrespects you, you disrespect him. He jual mahal, you jual mahal. It worked for me! I got things in my favour, sort of.

However (why is there always a however), be warned that the fire tactic comes with risks. Because now, in his eyes you're the bitchy difficult person to work with. Solution? Swallow your pride, fake smiles all around and an insincere ' i'm really sorry for the difficulty caused' even though you don't feel sorry at all and he doesn't deserve the sorry because you were fighting for your rights. An arrogant "It's OK" will emerge from the prick, like you were in the wrong and it was a due 'sorry'. Caution: It will make you feel like bursting into the Hulk and ripping his guts out and wrap it around his bloated head.

Telling youself that you're the bigger person will help sooth the burning rage.

Now i reaaallllyyy understand what people mean when they say 'I'm nice to you if you're nice to me'.

2. We have no right to defend ourselves against people in power.
When arguing with people in power, eg: mum, lectureres, boss, tight-ass clients, etc., 'defending' is 'justifying' and 'justifying' is what guilty people with prickly dispositions do. So no matter what you are accused for not doing is, there is no point in defending yourself and your honour because at the end of the day you are wrong and they are right because face it, who are you? you measly little scum that wouldn't be here if it weren't for me!?

So, being lectured? Just nodd and keep mumm. You don't even have to pay attention to what she/he is saying. You know what? Just let your mind wander altogether. Not listeing to what he/she is saying helps lessens the prickly unpleasent feeling you get at the back of your ribs because you can't defend yourself.

A fake look of since remorse can help shorten the lecture by approximately 5 to 15 minutes.

So boys and girls, the moral of today's lesson is,
there is not fairness in the world,
fake sincerity wisely.

Use it, don't abuse it!

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

i dont like sappy books

Train times and train waits,
train lates and train wakes,
sit sit sit wait wait wait,
all that time have been spent reading,
and I have finished reading The Zahir by Paolo Coelho.

it was,
not my cup of tea.

If you like all those spiritual journey metaphorical love crap, then yes you should take a gander at this book. If not, stay awaaaayyyyyyy. Paolo Coelho whined alot, in the book. Talking about the same thing again and again. but then again it is suppose to be a book about obsession, thats why he keeps repeating the same lines. tapi, boring sial.

for some reason I have been reading alot of whiny ass books. starting with the dissapointingly horrible Twilight.

I NEED SOME REAL DRAGONS SLAYERS AND BLOOD AND GUSH AND FICTION AND FAIRYTALES DAMNNIT! give me some suicidal virgins and confused hermaphrodites! some hobbits and drugged up musician and 3inch aliens?

i got to stop reading books i find laying around and go get some real books.